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Lawyer Jokes ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Lawyer One Liners 2 Q: Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer? Answer #1: Take your foot off his head. Answer #2: No? Good! Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff. Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"? A: There was an empty seat. Q: Where can you find a good lawyer? A: In the cemetary. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee? A: A boxing referee doesn't get paid extra for a longer fight. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? A: When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and an angry rhinoceros? A: The lawyer charges more. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline? A: You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline! Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a computer nerd? A: Sooner or later everyone needs a lawyer. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A: One is a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other is a catfish. Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk. Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a lawyer? A: A hooker will stop screwing you after you are dead. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo? A: A gigolo only screws one person at a time. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? A: A vampire only sucks blood at night. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? A: A lawyer can take off his wingtips. Q: What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A: A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer. Source: Unkown |
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