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Funny News Archive ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ March 7, 2006 Drunken hearse driver 'bit cop' A drunken hearse driver has been arrested in Germany after he bit the policeman who stopped him for driving erratically. The 42-year-old, from Krefeld, got drunk after being invited back to a wake by a grieving widow following her husband's funeral. Source: Ananova Police called to fight over toilet paper An argument over toilet paper overflowed into a fight, sending one motel maid to the hospital and another to jail. The maids at the Siesta Motor Lodge in North Charleston armed themselves with a plunger and mop after accusing each other of taking toilet paper from each other's cleaning carts, North Charleston police said. Source: Associated Press Local Principal Allegedly Fired For Kissing Boys' Feet A local high school principal may have been fired for kissing three of his students' feet, NewsChannel5 reported. Source: NewsNet5.com Karate mum saves son from bullies A middle-aged Russian mum has become a black belt in karate to protect her 22-year-old son from bullies. Valentina Ivanova, 50, felt forced into action after years of watching shy Danila getting bullied by local gangs in Moscow. Source: Ananova Patient Starts Flood at Downtown Hospital He thought he could turn fix a leaking faucet, but a patient at a downtown hospital wound up starting a flood. Source: WOAI March 4, 2006 Jade: Keira's boobs are like aspirins Jade Goody says Keira Knightley's breasts is like "two aspirins on an ironing board". The former Big Brother housemate says Keira has the smallest chest she's ever seen. Source: Ananova 83-Year-Old Is Longest-Serving UPS Employee Marty Peters started delivering packages for UPS in Detroit in 1946. Sixty years later, the 83-year-old still wears the brown uniform. Peters will be honored next week as the longest-serving employee among the company's more than 400-thousand workers. Source: WSBTV.com Dog Is Included in Sale of House Perhaps Rocky has a nose for real estate. The dog is credited with sealing a home sale in Missouri. Jared and Whittnie Essner met Rocky while house-hunting in Scott City, Mo., and knew they'd found their home - and their new dog. Source: My Way News Priest in trouble over sex tape A Romanian priest is in trouble after his plan to discredit a local councillor by filming him having sex in church backfired. Father Petrica Florea, 47, from Costesti, convinced a local 17-year-old girl to seduce Constantin Moise, 74, on the altar of a local church. Source: Ananova Two Teenagers Allegedly Steal, Crash Land Plane Two 14-year-old boys escaped with minor injuries after crash-landing a small plane that authorities say they stole from an airport hangar. Source: WFTV.com |
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