 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HumorHour.com competition - Win lots of prizes! |
|
Funny Quotes From My Name Is Earl ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (To the woman at the floral shop.) Randy: Ma'am, these vases always gonna make that sound when I'm drying them. The squeakin' makes my toes hurt. Natalie: My little butterfly flew away, but he came back. He came back. Earl: And like a butterfly, I too was trapped. But instead of a net, I was caught by a crazy girl wiping her nose on me. Randy: Being dead is definitely worse than being alive. When you're dead, you can't do all the cool stuff you can do when you're alive. You and I, we can do all kinds of cool stuff 'cause we're livin'. We're not dead. We're alive. If we were dead, we wouldn't be able to do all the cool stuff we can do because we're alive. Dead people can't do cool stuff. Only people that are alive can do cool stuff, because they're livin'. And you have to be livin' to be able to do cool stuff. You have to be alive. Yeah, except, when you're alive, sometimes bad stuff happens, too. Like sometimes you can get in a car wreck, or you can have a headache, or twist your ankle, or even stub your big toe. So bein' alive is kinda hard, too. But I think it's definitely better than being dead. Randy: Maybe you should listen to Catalina, she's a woman just like Natalie. They're both women, her and Natalie. You and I are men, we're not women. Earl (voice over): Sometimes Randy takes the long road to a simple thought. Randy: You see, men think different than women. You and I think different than Natalie and Catalina, because we're men and they're women. I'm right, right? I'm not wrong. Am I wrong? Earl: No. Randy: Are you gonna tell her that he's alive? She thinks he's dead, but he's not. He's not dead. He's living. He's alive. He's not dead like she thinks he is. |
 |
| ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
| Copyright © 2004-2011 HumorHour.com. All rights reserved. | - Return to Top - |