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Funny Quotes From Seinfeld
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DEAN JONES: I've been reviewing Darren's internship journal. Doing laundry, mending chicken wire, high tea with a Mr. Newman?
KRAMER: Well, it all sounds pretty glamourous, but it's business as usual at Kramerica.
DEAN JONES: Far as I can tell, your entire enterprise is little more than a solitary man with a messy apartment which may or may not contain a chicken.

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JERRY: He's working on lowering the cholesterol level in whales. All that blubber, it's quite unhealthy. You know, it's the largest mammal on earth. But as George says, they don't have to be.

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GEORGE: The sea was angry that day, my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli.

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KRAMER: She needs a little tenderness. She needs a little understanding. She needs a little Kramer.

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ELAINE: Maybe he's an enigma, a mystery wrapped in a riddle.
JERRY: He's a mystery wrapped in a Twinkie.

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GEORGE: Why couldn't you make me an architect? You know I always wanted to pretend that I was an architect.

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KRAMER: A wise man once taught me the healing power of the body's natural pressure points. He sells t-shirts outside the World Trade Center.

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JERRY: I don't know why you're interested in this guy. He's a jerk.
ELAINE: Because he doesn't pay any attention to me, and he ignores me.
JERRY: Yeah, so?
ELAINE: I respect that.
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