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Funny Quotes From Everybody Loves Raymond
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Robert: Alright, here we go cubby.
Ray: Trash talk allowed, right?
Robert: Bring it on!
Ray: Zero serving zero, you experimented in camp.
(Robert walks off)

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Ray: Zero serving six, you're fat and you smell.

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Frank: What's that sound?
Robert: It's like... rattling.
Frank: I know it's rattling, Columbo! Where's it comin' from?
Marie: Where your heart should be.

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Marie: Frank, put on the heat. It's freezing!
Frank: It's too expensive.
Marie: What's with you? We all have to get pneumonia so you can save three cents?!
Frank: You know Marie, most of the body's heat escapes through the head, so you might wanna seal up any lodged openings!

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(Marie starts hugging Frank while he is sitting down)
Frank: Whoa! What are you doing?
Marie: Snugling. For body warmth.
Frank: Puttin' on the heat!

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Frank: What did you call me 'dawg' for?!
Robert: That's a nice thing, Dad, you say it to people, it means 'I like you'.
Frank: Oh really? Well, from now on... I'm calling you 'Jackass'!
Marie: Frank!
Frank: That's a good thing, it means 'He's great'.
Ray: Hey.
Frank: (to Ray) Hey Ugly!
Ray: What?
Frank: That's Robert talk, it means 'You're good looking'. (to Marie) Hey good looking.

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Robert: That is so whack!
Ray: Okay, see right there... we're Italian. "Whack" means something else to us.

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Marie: Would you stop? The boys did nothing wrong. You wanted them to make you a tribute, they made you a tribute.
Frank: I can't wait for my eulogy.

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