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Funny Quotes From Father Ted
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How did that gobshite get on the television?

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FLOOR! COR-TAINS! GOBSHITE!

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Ted: Dougal, do we have any incense?
Dougal: (uncertainly) There was.. a spider in the bath the other night....

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You're sittin' there, watching those young boys in shorts. With a big smile on your face. Ye daerty fecker.

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Wait a second. You're Elvis as well!

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It's nice to have a nun around. Gives the place a bit of glamour.

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So then. You're a nun?

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Father Brendan: God Ben I'm such an eejit - I've put the shorts - on me head !
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